Revelation 2013...

This ain't a sadder rip-off of the 'greatest book' ever written in Indian history by 'THE ONE'(Err isn't that Neo from The Matrix trilogy?? Apparently no..), 'THE ONLY' dude who somehow has figured out What Young India Wants.... How did he know?? I am 21..I mean I am er...young(Yeah I just figured that out now),I am an Indian,annnnd I have no clue what so ever what I want... Let's quit the usual bull okay?

I often have mood swings that resemble a sinusoidal curve... So technicality kept aside,I have a sinus issue. This is resembling stuff that comes out from the backside of a huge thing with two horns...SSMMMOKE!...Yeah,you got me,the 'thing'  is the truck of a farmer from Punjab...(Even I am wondering why he has 2 hons instead of one..) MOVING ON...

Yeah so the sine curve.. Sometimes it just so happens that the lower part of the curve gets to me real bad. Now I...figured out a way to bend around this curve..  

Think of the worst that could happen in your situation. If you are coming out alive on the other side, until you forgot to look left,then right,and then left again while crossing the road, and someone on the road,sitting in a car,or even better,the Punjabi truck waala wanted to teach you a lesson for not following safety precaution while crossing a road by ramming the truck into you.....you can be a bit happier than what you are..

I feel like the SUPER GURU of all unhappy folks. And after typing that previous line,I feel like shit! So imagine the worst,feel the BEST!! The only reason I happen to drop this advise is so that ,iffff, someone reads this,(someone forbid his/her misery) and finds me gloomy on a nice looking day,they can at least tell me that I am a hypocrite..

For some very mystical and Kung-fuey reason,I figure there ain't no use being sad. Reason??The next bloke cracking a 'Sardar' joke will send you Rolling On The Floor laughing...,If you are of the category who uses the  expression ROTFl  and wonder what it means...nevermind. To the remaining, all apologies for the verbosity,folks.

AAAArrrrghhhh!!! Almost forgot!!!(Thankfully before I got beaten up!) All references to Sardarjis' is purely in light context...What I write is as it is highly likely to be misconstrued...
As a matter of fact,by Sardarjis' ,there's a thing I'd like to share(Apart from simply pressing a button most often..)

Here goes...

A few friends visited Delhi on a Holiday
and they hired a Taxi and went around.
They were "Fortunate" to have a Taxi driven by a Sardar.
Unmindful, they went on cracking Sardar Jokes One after another.

The Sardar  was mindful of His Work only.

Occasionally he smiled too without making any comments.

 

At the end of their trip they looked at the meter and gave the Sardar the Money for which the Sardar replied:

"I don't want your money but instead you take this Rs 5"

surprised the friends asked :"Why"

"No.If you meet any Sardar Beggar on the streets pls donate this Rs 5 to him"

 

The friends said "It is True..they never ever saw a Sardar Beggar on the streets!"

 

Despite all the Jokes on them..they Work their way thro..

Others Joke their way somehow!

To all my turbaned friends..Paji,tussi great ho!!

---

Is it that hard??

For the past over 2 hours, I have been..well writing and...thinking about a bunch of things..
Hell with it!! My mind is simply torn in pieces!! I am to fill this questionnaire having a few questions(Oh,since when did questionnaires start having questions in them??) Yeah,clearly the questions have gotten o me. Actually it is more like the profoundness of the questions that happens to have gotten to me.
When we're kids,we are asked stuff like 'What do you want to be when you grow up?' or maybe someone asks you a simple addition problem(the guy's a freaking nerd,the one who asked you the math problem..).You answer it correctly,you get a pat on the back,maybe if the nerd's carrying a chocolate,that too. Your parents are not able to breathe out of happiness,and you think your I.Q. surpasses that of Einstein and everything goes happily (mind the lack of 'ever after') until the same humble question 'what you want to do after growing up' comes in front of you in a slightly altered way 'What are you passionate about in your life'. Now this is a trick question.. Here's the trick..You are asked this question...AFTER you turn into the supposed 'grown up'...
That's like this... If you are a minister under a dictatorship,and the king/ruler asks you how long it will take (practically of course) to implement a particular policy,let us take this 'practically possible' time as about 6 months. Now the ruler tells you to consider today,i.e. the day he orders the policy implementation,as the last day of that ruddy practical 6 month time frame. You go like.."Shit,We're in deep shit!!"
We know that If you want to live at least a 'Happily TEMPORARILY after' life,you need to make your passion your work. So basically I wasted a complete line/sentence telling you what everyone knows.
But if you happen to know what EXACTLY your passion/s in life is/are in superb clarity,then before I write my favorite line(in a minute..),I bow to you,your excellency..But then "I shall" also "find you,and kill you!!!"(Speciallly of you're under 21) Howwww??? Howww?? How do you pull this off?
I obviously decided to spare your life if you are reading this..
If I want to answer the question without slightest prudence,I will honestly say I am passionate about being famous,YES I am cocky while I say that,YES I am abbbbsolutely sounding nuts,and frankly I don't have a clue of how I shall/will become famous.
This brings me to 2 words that I have been procrastinating to use for the longest time ever..

POSITIVE PRESSURE
I realized that what I write is actually an inner response to publicly announce my intentions to the world. You see,If you leave your thought to yourself in that tiny corner of that brain of yours,you always have a choice of forgetting that thought,of telling it a nice little TATA,and strangulating it till it dies. To the outside world,your thought never existed. When you announce the thought to the universe,you want to work towards your goal a lot more instead of the usual case that obviously happens a lot more...Not that the world may care,but some external attack is a lot more likely.Post inception,it is an intrinsic tendency of every organism to protect it's best interests. So you protect your ideas,hopefully nurture it and,it eventually grows into 'the' big coconut tree(Life or a part of it,lived in Kerala has it's own quirks I see..)
This surely has it's downsides,but what doesn't?

And what I am shooting for right now,are ideas...Ideas worth spreading,or the people who can be the vehicle for this idea.Maybe,as the saying goes,'An Idea can change your life'...Yeah,mine's round the corner I suppose,or desperately hope..
I desperately want to write a book of my own,and not of the self-help variety!! I can see how badly I am boring myself.This is all about I,the Me and the Myself every how! Amen..
Anyone around?? I am feeling pukishly insane by the way!! Helllllowwwwww!!!!
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This feels like a conversation with the girl you have a huge crush on/are madly in love with(trust me,this feeling,I know for sure)...It's like,you think about a thousand things that you have in mind that you want to tell her,and when the time comes to yap,you can't open your mouth!!
The feeling sucks,I tell you!!
In the mean time,if possible,let me know how you answer the damn question!!

It just gushes out!!!

Wow! I have been so successful in not making you think of a freakish orgasm! Oooh! 'ORGASM'!! Did I just utter some obnoxious word which isn't to be uttered in public? Just kidding!
It has been 3..umm 4 I guess days since I last wrote. So for the past 4 days,I have been making the world a better place to live in. You see,you feel absolutely great when you put yourself in a position that is so indispensable that *...err wait a minute...,okay this is super awkward...How in the universe do you manage to forget what you were about to say in the middle of the sentence?? Let's move on for now by putting a '*' where I left the sentence midway,so next time you see a '*',you know what just happened. I HAD AN AMNESIA ATTACK!! THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED!!!! Yeah..

It's been a while that I am uncontrollably banging my head around.Not that I remember the places I banged my head,but there is this crappy head ache that I have. Yeah. I just have a head ache I  guess. My fingers have been itching to write something. Anything!! It just so happens that apart from being someone desperate, I also happen to be the super human version of a procrastinator.
It's like if I were to do something, My body just finds a way to do anything but 'THE' something. You know what? I have seen too many people being too proud of themselves for being procrastinators.. NOW THAT!! sounded like Arnold Schwarzenegger(Yay!!Hurray! I got the spelling of Schwarzenegger correct without looking for it in google!!!) looking like a fat arse instead of a beefcake,sitting on bicycle while trying to chase T-2000. By the way,If you haven't see Terminator,YOUR LIFE OFFICIALLY SUCKS!! You deserve a big huge certificate acknowledging your suckiness(does this word exist?)!!
Back to procrastination,by the way,human ability absolutely surprises me. I mean,
Every time I look in the mirror,
All these lines,on my face getting clearer..
The past is gonnnnne,
It went by,like dusk to dawn...
Isn't that the way,Everybody's got their dues in life to pay......
Err NO!!
You see,I have this innate ability to produce absolutely  meaningless pieces of text Consistently,Relentlessly let's go a step further..Ammmazingly! (No rotten tomatoes please..)

Yeah,This is my version of ...well CREATIVE EXPRESSION. Now..If you don't get this,"I shall find you..And then I shall kill you." And before I kill you,I will click a photograph of you holding a certificate that irrevocably pronounces you as the wife of...err..crap! It just has to happen when I am  completely in a mood to kick arse!! And then I look something like this...

And since I hate to be 'politically correct' I also realize that I might be on my way to getting a bullet put in my head..

Funny side up,now a bit of a sentimental part to the post....I mean,till when am I going to be 'the guy who tries to make you laugh...and miserably fails??' WHATT?? You don't laugh?? 

Again...Why so serious??

Diary of THE short Dude.....: Too much to say

Diary of THE short Dude.....: Too much to say: I am pretty sure 99% people won't go beyond 7)  .Are you in the 1% ?? 1)Say.... My mom tells me I don't talk all that much. And I...

Too much to say

I am pretty sure 99% people won't go beyond 7)  .Are you in the 1% ??
1)Say....
My mom tells me I don't talk all that much. And I say,"yeah maybe,you're not the first one to tell me that". And somehow I don't believe that I don't talk much. I sure do like to be on the other side of the...er.. speaker.
As a matter of fact,I don't mind talking. I just find it easier to write,or in this case,type. This has gone to a point where I get these urges to just say my thing through my fingers and get over it. The upside to this is (this next line is cocky) I get people to do what their parents keep nagging them about. Just kidding...
From where I see,hope you will too(someday,not any time soon. Don't take my readership!!!!),it is THE most humbling experience to see someone devote their precious time,YES even when they are jobless,to something that took birth in your mind.

2) Outlie!!
I just saw this movie 'The blind side'. Recently,I also read Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. And right now,I am showing off out in the open. And...I am also deviating from the point I want to make.
Both the above mentioned movie and book emphasize on how,unlike what we usually think,i.e. "I am totally self made!!" or "surroundings don't make any differences" and the likes, we are a product of our surroundings. I mean just imagine,as a very simple example, if had your/my grandparents chosen to (crudely put) mate with someone else,the world would have gone on as it is,yeah sure it may just have missed on a genius or two,but then,in that other parallel universe,no one would have known,now isn't it?? I mean,you might have not read this page,or keeping in line with my 'Being Humble' theme,I wouldn't have written this piece of gibberish(please tell me it ain't so).
I mean looking at it,I wouldn't have felt this sort of desperation to do what I am doing,Which is What,I know Not,had I not run into too many wonderful people,whom I shall not mention,as they know for themselves who they are. I never before wanted to so badly know how far I can go.
To thee,I thank for Free....
Hmm... I guess Shakespeare's working his way into my head now...

3)Screw-ups
-You either die a hero,or live long enough to see yourself turn into a villain.
This is one of my favorite quotes among the few I love,that came from a movie.
The other being-"I asked god for a bike. I figured that is not how things work,so I stole one and asked god for forgiveness"-Al Pacino
Let us concentrate on the first quote. Actually,let's tweak it a little. It happens to resemble another quote. Here's the TWEAK-"You either live long enough to learn from everyone's mistake,or you have the balls to make some and learn yourself". You know the worst part? I am feeling pathetically preachy after writing like that. I used to believe that I happen to be a creature of reason. Someone just told me that there was a 'not' in the previous sentence between 'happen' and 'to'.
Seriously,If you ask me why I am writing what I am writing,(okay,If you have read any previous post of this blog,this line is probably a cliche by now) I could give a shoulder shrug at best as an answer... Okay,screw-ups over,now what??

4)Good Will Hunting
Brilliant movie by the way!! It convinces you somehow that being clueless of what you want to do is not too much to be concerned with,as long as you are sure you will be able to do something with your life and times. Mark my words, that is not even anywhere in the lines of what the movie is trying to tell!! Watch it for yourself!! It is a brilliant move for sure.
I am on my own hunting trip for goodwill. My room mate Vineet reminded me of this one quote-
If everyone is happy with what you are doing,there is something definitely wrong that you are doing ! At such times,two things can save you.
1-you realise that your situation is exactly matching that of the above quotation.
2-You have a genuine well-wisher(you are lucky to have this luxury) who slaps you on the head and shakes you back to reality.
I have been lucky to have at least a handful of such people.

5) 10000..
Yes indeed,that sure is a very round number. Remove the '1' and it becomes a circular figure. On a lighter note, I am in shape. Yeah round is a shape!! Bad joke...Moving on!!
Many fellows have gone about singing this number's specialty.
It is said,and quite widely verified,not exactly with mathematical precision though,that if you do any one particular thing,preferably of your choice,for 10000 hours,you become a complete champion at it.
With just over 8000 hours a year,8060 to be precise,these 10000 hours are no walk in the park. One thing...How did the term cake walk come into the vocabulary?? I mean, when I imagine someone,quite literally, walking over a cake,I think 2 things happen.
a-the cake gets really screwed up due to someone being stupid enough to walk over it
b-more often than not,the stupid person falls after slipping.

About the 10000 hours,how many of us can explicitly(not necessary) mention on thing...ONE bloody thing(not sleeping!!) that we have surely done for anywhere close to 10000 hours. If you happen to be the one who can,    
good for you woman/man!! I mean what else can I say? Yeah,I shall catch up soon!!
I read this recent interview of Jeffery Archer in a magazine. At 73,he writes 8 hours a day!!!!
Can you imagine??(of course you can't! I mean how can you??) Even at this rate and age,he will outrun us to our 10000 hour race!

6) Prisoner of birth- Okay,to you Jeffery Archer fans, I wish to catch a reader's attention merely by the  title of my book,if that dream of mine comes true(mostly will!!)
I have had this feeling for a while...It will completely assist you in your proof to prove me insane.
Here's the feeling-Somehow,this body,the three dimensions we see and move in,apparently of course(you see we want to keep the theoretical physicists happy!) are somehow a confinement. Thee is a sort of a limitation in whatever we do. My feelings obviously have no connections with the contents of the above mentioned book,which by the way,I am dying to read!!
After getting my above mentioned feeling,I made the biggest mistake of my life...yeeeeeaannnooo....
Okay here's the blunder anyways.I saw The Matrix. And now I feel I am living a life of a schizophreniac(if there is anything of the sort). The upside to this is that you question everything and Michio Kaku's mission of promoting Discovery channel's motto becomes successful.

By the way,If you didn't like what you just read,let me add to your misery. After getting inspired by a senior,I have decided to write at least a post everyday. I have also decided to start 2 new blogs.
Damn it!! So much for creating positive pressure. More on Positive pressure,later(may be,maybe not).
I happen to see 04:23 on the clock.My mom just came into my room for the 3rd time in the night to put me to sleep(I hate sleep!!!) !!!

As a last act of kindness,do me a favor.Read the first line again please :)

Idea!

This one is actually  surprisingly short. I can see you thanking me already.
I purposely didn't want to keep a raunchy title for this one.
For good(hopefully),I have decided to stop swearing.
For a change I will be subtle.

I am unable to recollect the source of this quote(it was some poem I guess)
"An idea is like a train.If you don't catch it,(err...this is the tricky part now...)you'll miss it!!"
Yeah! Very profound,specially the second half..
I would like to rephrase the above quote to suit the more unsettled mind.
An idea is like a train's compartment. So if you are like me who misses trains very often,START REACHING THE STATION A BIT BEFORE THE TRAIN ARRIVES.I was lying about being subtle!!! Got the joke?? Got it?? Got it?? heh??

Diary of a short Dude.....: To ladies..and other beautiful things

Diary of a short Dude.....: To ladies..and other beautiful things: Standing instructions to reading these posts.... DO NOT!!! I repeat DO NOT SKIP THE STUFF IN THE BRACKETS,for two reasons... 1-You aren&#...

To ladies..and other beautiful things

Standing instructions to reading these posts....
DO NOT!!! I repeat DO NOT SKIP THE STUFF IN THE BRACKETS,for two reasons...
1-You aren't reading this out loud..I mean,if you are reading this loud,youuu should stop.
STATUTORY WARNING: The following may contain pieces of adult vocabulary(abuses basically),no offences meant,obviously.
2-You miss half the stuff(quite literally)
3-Babe,It's going to be a lonnnnnng ride :P
4-As usual,please do pardon me for minor grammatical nuances.I am working on it.

I couldn't choose a better time to write this blog. Not a better time because...I just felt like using that line I guess... I only go about typing stuff when there's this presssssing need for me to somehow express how I feel as "Jo bhi main,Kehna chahu,Barbaad kare,Alfaaz mere"(My words fuck up stuff that I intend to say)
Anyways,this post is dedicated to something we seldom do. Appreciate,And other obvious things.
I have this very volatile mind,more like restless,errr even reckless mind...basically a devil's workshop.Nothing works when it should(later on why I mention such an impertinent matter of fact...okay there's nothing more on it later!!) I am still working on how I co-related a devil's workshop to how my mind doesn't work and currently have no explanation for the same.
Cutting straight to the crap!!!

I have this problem(I am pretty sure I am not alone here).For some reason,I am totally incapable of conveying my feelings to anything human,unless via some medium of this sort.
Here's the thing. Look,If you have been told something good about yourself by someone(other than the thing in the mirror),wouldn't you feel happy?? I would well be sailing 18 fathoms above cloud 9 if someone even remotely hinted any appreciation in my direction.(DO NOT ASK WHY 18 FATHOMS AND NOT SOME *&£$ FATHOMS!!!)
I was travelling to my grandparents' in a train. I was mindlessly looking around,no place to sit,totally jobless,somehow hoping for the journey to get over..And then,my glance hits this face. From the very microsecond I saw this person(you ever get that feeling of seeing something before actually seeing it?? that sort of feeling),I knew what I saw was absolutely beautiful.
There wasn't a thing about the face that stood out,very simple,no part/feature that makes say an 'Angelina Jolie type' face beautiful. She was about my mom's age but that doesn't stop either my mom or the lady from being beautiful. Seriously,age won't come in the way of beauty!!Wrinkles or no wrinkles!!Either you are beautiful,orrr........you are beautiful in another way!
Coming back,so I was so desperate to tell this lady how beautiful she was. I have another issue.This one isn't a problem,it is something I am very proud of. Somehow,conventional beauty doesn't get to me.Okay,that is my way of rephrasing what my friends say "You have a weird choice...."
And yeah,we all know what happened to the train lady story... I didn't tell her(like many a times before),and sort of lost my chance to make the lady smile,annnnnd also prevented myself from being called a weirdo!! NOW....how much better can it get??
A probable reason that also led me to  not tell the lady was the fact that.....my DAD was standing behind me!!!! You see how much better it gets??
Fortunately,by some stroke of luck,I happened to see a book in the lady's hand....Heee....Heee...Heee....
If that is what you consider a devil's laugh,it is precisely what it is.
Why the "Heee....Heee...Heee...."??? The book she was reading was the same I had finished a week ago....
Heee....Heee...Heee....
Heee....Heee...Heee....
Heee....Heee...Heee....
Heee....Heee...Heee....
WWWWOKKKKAAAAYYYYY!!! Not funny enough. Let's get along. So I ask how she found the book,told her how I thought the book was,without her asking of course :D ,she luckily had a similar opinion about the book(now I love reading even more!!!). Here's the bummer,seconds after I barely struck up a broken conversation with her,...........................................her station came.  .  .  .  .  .  .
.
.
.
.
.
.
Forever lonely......... :'-'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''(
Fellows at google!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeasssssssssssseeee add a button for emoticons!!!! THE POSTS BECOME TOOOOO DRY!!!!!!
Hmmmmm....there was this onnnnnne upside..just ONE upside to all this. The lady and her friend(whom I noticed at the time when they were getting down) offered their seats to us,(POPsicle and me,and yeah,I usually don't call my dad POPsicle,sounds cool though)

To my horror,this is not the first time I missed out on appreciating another homo sapien.This very day,oh,now yesterday,my house helper got her kid girl home for some reason,I mean,cute little thing...I was watching some cooking show,the girl hid somewhere behind,wondering what I was watching(perverts,STAY AT BAY!!),I kept watching.If you have realized,kids have this positive field around them(I feel like an octagenarian when I write this),you feel this anywhere nearby and you go *BLING!*,smiley face!! Best thing is,you give them a smile,they bloody well give back a bigger one,unlike the 'grown ups',at whom if you give a genuine smile,you may hear a murmur 'weirdo' five seconds later. They will even question your happiness...
Back to the kid. So the kid and her mother were leaving,and my mom mentioned that it was the kid's D-day.... I mean B-day....Wake up sleeping beauty!!!!
I so badly wanted to shake the kid's hand,and probably even sing to her(errrr...probably not that part),I mean somehow wish her a happy birthday and see an innocent smile(seriously a rare sight..).
It's so easy to make a kid feel special!!
And all I fuckkkkking did was.......let her go....Verrrrrrry Happenning Life of Mine(Hmm.. sounds like a good title for my autobiography,'auto' because only I will be the one reading it....orrrr mayyyybe not.Fingers crossed)

About the train lady,I 'kind-of' do not count my dad's presence as THE big deterrent. Just that that day,I didn't have the balls!!!
You know that feeling that you get of slamming your face hard with your palms when you create a blunder??(very well illustrated in cartoons).That is exactly how I felt in both cases above..Okay more so in 'The case of the Train Lady'(Wow,that sounded like a Sherlock Holmes story!!)
I mean FUCK!!! I didn't ask her name!! All right All right I am 'Over exaggerating'..but jussst maybe,rather hopefully people won't consider you a weirdo if you appreciate them upfront.
There are another many cases when this has happened to me. There have been numerous people(honestly,mostly being women) whom I genuinely appreciate,not necessarily for aesthetic reasons,and....as you guessed,I HAVEN'T TOLD THEM!!!!

So how I want to end this is........If you want to tell someone something,TELL IT!
Why?? Here's why...
1-You discover you have the balls to do something more than half the remaining of your kind can't(luckily,I have felt this a few countable times too,trust me,it feels great!!)
2-You make it a lot easier,and a lot less weirder to show your gesture of appreciation publicly.
3-You mostly will make someone smile(if not blush...)

To all the people I wanted to say 'You're beautiful',if/not I have said this, YOU ARE
B-E-A-UTIFUL!!  And if I haven't told you this...then I am an A-R-S-E-H-O-L-E. Hmmmm...I guess you can't get the 'B-E-A-UTIFUL' effect with ARSEHOLE.... Sad shit....

I suck at math.

The world likes heroes...What they like more is to see a hero fall.....
Okay one more....
You either die a hero....or you live long enough to see yourself become a villain...
I figured out that I suck at mathematics...annnd i suck at spelling too(I mean look at my spelling of 'and' :P..............Not exactly,I spelled  villain as villian) SUCKS!!!
Never mind the movie phrases.They are the discrepancies in my thought process.. NO!!!!
Look,If you live a life where you are not the hero/heroine of the movie called YOUR LIFE,trust me,YOUR LIFE SUCKS!!!!!(Get the double meaning?? huh?? Do you??) Much more than mine even if my math is worse than yours..annd spelling too!!!

Back to the topic...
I remember,hopefully you do too(unless of course you suffer from dementia) that the first subject,our parents(specially dads) asked us for now...however old you are,subtract 4 years from your life and count till you did graduation...that is about...ummmm what 17-18 years is,"How much did you get in mathematics??"...and soon came the next question..."What was the class highest??"
Ha....Ha....Ha......................................................................Ha...(Okay I should stop trying to imitate the Joker,can't help it though.)
So If you happen to "sucksessfully" read through all the stuff in the brackets,I don't know maybe try to see if you can remember what the title of this post was...........
Okkkayy....now seriously serious...hmmm........
I totally get it,I mean sort of,in parts....so if there are 100 parts,I may get like 2/3 or maybe 4.
Mathematics(atleast scoring in the subject) makes you look like a fucking genius!!
If you flunked in 3 of 6 of your subjects,and you ace math,you are like THE MAN/WOMAN(phew,so much to not sound sexist...)
I personally don't have anything against mathematics.As a matter of fact,I love mathematics. It is one of the few things you run into in probably every field in life. It is sort of omnipresent. If I believed in god,I'd say god would be mathematics..I mean that's is all I have picked up from my 'god believing' friends. No offence whatsoever.

Something about mathematics really makes you look cool and intellectual....annnd...err nerdy annnd  go feel free to add your own adjectives.
Yeah,I mean so much of scientific research has gone onto checking which part of your grey matter lights up like a Christmas tree when you solve a math problem as it involves n+1 amount of cognitive skills to power through a problem...blah....blah...blah..
I mean no sarcasm(for a change) but it is something hard to imagine how we naturally evolved ways to  solve....stufff....ENOUGH!!!

I shall tell you something that will make most readers of this post verry happpppy....
I feel pretty sure I am going to flunk this times mathematics exam of my end semester..Screw it!!!!
Quite frankly speaking,all this rant of mine comes from the guilt of the above highly probable reality.
I somehow learnt it the hard way to not give a fuck about stuff I can do nothing about.I might sound delusional but it's not that I don't understand the subject. I understand stuff in class,I answer the teacher's questions(correctly),I sit in front of the class to ensure that I don't nod off in this particcccular subject. I also happen to realize that I take these precautions to not disappoint my dad when the same repetitive questions come my way...but then exams come and I go ....POOF....All the air I put so painstakingly into the balloon,comes out of the backside(of the balloon). I just can't see  how some fellows get not a word,thy get hold of the procedure,vomit it onto the answer sheet and Woalah!! Chamatkaar Tauu!!!(Miracle,Uncle!!!)
I obviously don't mean that for the majority,but this crowd is definitely not a minority.
Eh...never mind.I don't know why,there has been a deluge of people,books,talks and another dozen things that have convinced me that I do not want a desk job.I definitely  have no clue whatsoever what I am going to do after my graduation,and It kills me to see people so convinced of what they want to do in life...or maybe I am taking it all too seriously...orrrrrr mayyyyybe not. I am so freaking confused!!! Too much of uncertainity...too much to do....too short a life and while I type this,I feel like a complete arsehole!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!