"If you don't have an MBA, you are of no use."
If you are an engineer by education, a male by gender, and pissed by nature, it's because you have heard the above line from your father too many times. You wonder... "Steve Jobs never did an MBA, never went to an IIT, and yet became the legend he is." Mind you, that's a very dull thought. Because you are missing a multitude of people who accomplished a lot without doing an MBA or going to an IIT. But that again, is a different story.
I was watching a few Stand-up comedians doing their Father-MBA-life-planning gig. All of them were unsurprisingly engineers. This was half an hour before my dad came along and told me to start preparing for next year's Common Entrance Examination. It's been a while since I get the feeling that he's not too happy with what I am doing... Writing. Never a profession my dad dreamed I'd take up. Never mind the daddy talk. Just that I saw this talk coming. And from what I know, it's not going to be easy from here on... our conversations.
I discovered something recently. Vibes. Our thoughts are vibrations. And they surround you. Your aura. All metaphysical objects. If ever you have a very strong thought, it will manifest itself in another person in your immediate surrounding. Especially if you don't want anyone to peep into your mind and fish the thought out of you. It happens so smoothly that you find it hard to believe. I have two examples that corroborate my theory.
One is the MBA-thought I foresaw my dad coming to me with. The second happened in my office. I had to make a list of a bunch of cars that were to launch in the coming year. I missed out one. In the last moments before my submission deadline, I realized my mistake. I panicked like crazy. Just as went to make the change in the list, my boss, who had seen the preliminary list called out to me. He pinpointed at the exact car that I had missed out on. This is two weeks after he had signed off the initial list. Bloody hell. So yeah, if you have a bad thought, that is very strong in your head, it's only a matter of time before the thought infects another mind.
About the Engineer-MBA thingy, in case you are an engineer, I honestly have no idea if my dad's talking sense. Because I have no plans on becoming a human calculator for another organisation anytime soon. Ever, in fact. Maybe dads are shit-scared in general. More so if you are not the totally-out-of-control types. You see, here's the problem. You either be a complete book-worm, or you HAVE to be the jack-shit-crazy, hopeless child who no one has any grab over. The fellows in the middle, somehow are expected to be obedient, responsible, tame and stable-minded. I say daft. What a drag.
Okay, one second. My world just crumbled to biscuit pieces. I heard from a stand-up artist that there's an exclusive matrimonial site for alumnus of premier engineering and management institutes. I thought it was all a joke. So I did what any unsuspecting audience would. I googled "IIT IIM Matrimony". Here's what I found....
iitiimshaadi.com- Apparently,
If you are an engineer by education, a male by gender, and pissed by nature, it's because you have heard the above line from your father too many times. You wonder... "Steve Jobs never did an MBA, never went to an IIT, and yet became the legend he is." Mind you, that's a very dull thought. Because you are missing a multitude of people who accomplished a lot without doing an MBA or going to an IIT. But that again, is a different story.
I was watching a few Stand-up comedians doing their Father-MBA-life-planning gig. All of them were unsurprisingly engineers. This was half an hour before my dad came along and told me to start preparing for next year's Common Entrance Examination. It's been a while since I get the feeling that he's not too happy with what I am doing... Writing. Never a profession my dad dreamed I'd take up. Never mind the daddy talk. Just that I saw this talk coming. And from what I know, it's not going to be easy from here on... our conversations.
I discovered something recently. Vibes. Our thoughts are vibrations. And they surround you. Your aura. All metaphysical objects. If ever you have a very strong thought, it will manifest itself in another person in your immediate surrounding. Especially if you don't want anyone to peep into your mind and fish the thought out of you. It happens so smoothly that you find it hard to believe. I have two examples that corroborate my theory.
One is the MBA-thought I foresaw my dad coming to me with. The second happened in my office. I had to make a list of a bunch of cars that were to launch in the coming year. I missed out one. In the last moments before my submission deadline, I realized my mistake. I panicked like crazy. Just as went to make the change in the list, my boss, who had seen the preliminary list called out to me. He pinpointed at the exact car that I had missed out on. This is two weeks after he had signed off the initial list. Bloody hell. So yeah, if you have a bad thought, that is very strong in your head, it's only a matter of time before the thought infects another mind.
About the Engineer-MBA thingy, in case you are an engineer, I honestly have no idea if my dad's talking sense. Because I have no plans on becoming a human calculator for another organisation anytime soon. Ever, in fact. Maybe dads are shit-scared in general. More so if you are not the totally-out-of-control types. You see, here's the problem. You either be a complete book-worm, or you HAVE to be the jack-shit-crazy, hopeless child who no one has any grab over. The fellows in the middle, somehow are expected to be obedient, responsible, tame and stable-minded. I say daft. What a drag.
Okay, one second. My world just crumbled to biscuit pieces. I heard from a stand-up artist that there's an exclusive matrimonial site for alumnus of premier engineering and management institutes. I thought it was all a joke. So I did what any unsuspecting audience would. I googled "IIT IIM Matrimony". Here's what I found....
iitiimshaadi.com- Apparently,
ALMA MATER MATTERS
"We invite registration from alumni of top few Indian and Global Institutions"
This website even has a fee-structure for registration. It's like bloody going back to college. Rs. 4580 for Indians, and $90 for alumnus staying in the US.
Oi! There's hold on! There's one more site..
iitiimatrimony.com- These chaps are subtle. They just advertise themselves as the World's Premier Matrimonial site. How cute!
So that's what's going on in the mind of every engineer's father... "Beta, you as it is suck in dealing with girls. So I have a better idea. You ace your engineering from an IIT, an NIT at the very least. Then you solve some crazy mental-math problems and get yourself a seat in an IIM. Any IIM, as long as it is not the one in Sikkim. After you're through with post-graduation, we'll look for a gold-digging woman for you to have sex with, and that shall be the story of your life. Plain and simple."
So here's a question. Pipe A fills a tank in 5 hours. Pipe B fills the same tank in 3 hours. If you're an engineer, you've already started calculating the time in which both tanks will fill the tank if opened simultaneously. I know. It happens, darling. Oh! Now, there'a also a pipe that draws water out of the tank. It can empty the tank in 2 hours. Now you need to tell me the average weight of all the oranges that have ever existed.
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