And now, the last four months...

I feel time ticking faster than ever as I watch the cursor blink on my screen. Each time, taking a second away from the time I have remaining in this place, that now IS my home. I say this because when I went back to my parents, this vacation, I felt completely out of place. 

Three and a half years went by like a gust of wind. It blew me away, whistled in my ear, comforted me under scorching sun, threw dust in my eyes and made me cry, strengthened my roots, but most importantly, taught me to fly.

I remember the first day I stepped into the college campus. I actually did  not step into the campus. I drove into it. Okay, bad joke!

What I do remember is the rain thrashing against the car's wind screen and windows with the same excitement that was brewing inside of me, for staying away from home was a first-time thing for me. I thought I'd miss mum and dad a lot. My grandmother was skeptical as to how I'd live without my mum. A day hadn't passed in college, that I completely forgot about where I came from, or whom I'd miss. It was life's  new chapter. A clean slate. Sadly, my mum is still plagued with the thought "Oh my god, how will my son live without me?". Sorry mom... I'm alive and kicking!! I somehow feel heartless saying that.

Today morning, I sped through all the paraphernalia that one needs to go though to get enrolled into the next semester. It all happened a lot faster than I thought. But now, as I sit jobless, ruminating about all that has happened in the past 3 odd years, I feel a tad bit pathetic. I mean, these four months that remain, feel like the last four months of life, well at least a part of my life. It feels like running at full speed toward the edge of a cliff, not slowing down one bit. Or I may just be getting far too sentimental.

Of all the things I thought I'd do in the four years of college, a lot many things remain pending. I day-dreamed my way through over three years. It doesn't feel that long  when you look at it in hindsight. But somewhere in the back of my mind, I know for a fact that roughly one-fifth of my lived life has flashed past me, that too, right in front of my eyes. 

But that is all the looking back I want to do for now. The time I have at hand is ticking like a count-down timer on the screen of an online examination. And hence, time is of the essence. 

How I hope to live this time out! 

Burn every ounce of myself in the quests of all I want, 

as I already have all that I need.

Only Robert Frost's lines can describe how I fee right now...

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,   

But I have promises to keep,   

And miles to go before I sleep,   

And miles to go before I sleep.

Stop this train I want to get off and go home again,
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
But honestly won't someone Stop this train!