The moment anything goes in an unorthodox manner in a society, that is to say, anything hard to digest for general public, but at the same time, favors the individual, the society pulls out its weaponry, one by one, to slow down the individual. Even to the extent of completely preventing him/her from attaining his/her intended goal. In a way, this tendency of the human race, its despise for the progress of the individual has helped keep crime under check, or has at least allowed us to prevent collateral damage associated to crimes, though obviously not quite completely. That is because progress, when it comes to a criminal (an individual), means successfully committing the crime. So preventing his progress/success effectively stops the crime. By writing that line, I get a feeling that I am underestimating your intelligence. Yikes!
But our collective despise for aspirations of non-criminal citizens of the world is what baffles me. Sure, were it not for jealousy, there would be no competition, and we would all be controlled by a handful of people producing all our daily requirements, and hence we would not exactly have a "choice" while choosing what to buy and what not to. Carefully notice. This phenomenon, that of a handful of companies controlling us, is already a reality. Nevertheless, that being a topic for another post, I shall continue, as jealousy and despise are completely different.
Despise is the feeling of revulsion/contempt for something. This something is usually what people can do nothing about. And since they can do nothing about it, their emotion remains an emotion, and nothing more.
As I was saying, the moment there is a despicable human in sight, the society, specially now that it cannot do anything about the situation, pulls out the "Shame" card.
The teacher says "Shame on you for XYZ!"
Your friends say "Shame on you for ABC!"
Then the world says "Shame on you for PQR!"
It's like the dialogue in the movie Devdas...
माँ ने कहा "घर छोड़ दो", पारो ने कहा "मुझे छोड़ दो", तुम कहती हो "शराब छोड़ दो"।कल कोई कहेगा "दुनिया ही छोड़ दो ।"
Translation...
(My mom told me to leave the house. Paaro(his lover) told him to leave her. Now you(Chandramukhi-a prostitute Devdas falls in love with..) are telling me to leave alcohol. Tomorrow, someone will tell me to leave the world...)
Okay, that dialogue might just have completely derailed the message I wanted to convey through this post. But damn! What a dialogue! Again, moving on.
What I want to say is "Jaa chudail!!". Apologies...
What I actually want to say is that the moment your personal gains even remotely diverge from that of the general public, the first thing the world seems to do is to make you feel ashamed of it. What you shall read next might sound counterintuitive to what you just read.
It is we who feel that the world is making us feel ashamed. this "feeling" of ours has obviously been reinforced by our surroundings, by the people we hold dear, specially those who tell us that the world is a hostile place.
NOOOO! Are you crazy?? The world isn't a hostile place! It is just indifferent! It doesn't give a shit about the individual! And why should it? What's in it for them, the rest of the world, if you make progress? In case they benefit from you, sure as hell will they join the band-wagon! But otherwise, the whole conspiracy theory of "The world trying to make you feel ashamed for what you want to do" is purely a simulation in our own heads.
Imagine this. You are in an embarrassing position with a thousand onlookers. If a thousand onlookers feels far too intimidating, imagine yourself in a classroom. Now imagine that you made a blunder somewhere, and unfortunately, the teacher caught you while making the blunder. You become the laughing stock. CONGRATULATIONS! Now, spend the entire evening, or day, or week, or a fortnight feeling miserable for being laughed at. We all are perfectly capable of wallowing in our sorrows endlessly. So much for all the intelligence!
OR think of the situation in this way. How are the people, who laughed a you, going to matter to you in a certain time frame? Say 2 years, or even 2 months? I'm pretty sure the people won't make a difference. I am a staunch believer of solipsism. As an individual, the thoughts of another individual are immaterial to you. Specially if the other individual's thoughts are holding you back from attaining what you want.
Basically, what I just figured out while I am writing all of this, is that everything we think, is all, completely inside our own heads. To the extent that even our secrets don't matter, specially if you share them with someone. Your secret is a reality for you. Yeah, sure very few people know about it. But that is because one is "ashamed" of it for some reason.
I don't think feeling proud of one's feelings, one's intimate details is going to make anyone feel miserable. Rather own your feelings, cherish the fact that one has a mind that can feel so much, than feel pathetic about what the world might think/make of them.
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